I'm not sure what happened, but I fell asleep, woke up and Christmas was over. Okay, not technically, but sort of. I found myself with a horrible case of pneumonia the week of Christmas. I was so sick that there were several days where I could not even get out of bed. At all. Somehow, my family came to my rescue and kids were carted to and from school and cared for. There were even a few afternoons where I literally locked Cameron in my room with toys and literally passed out. (Not one of my best Mother of the year moments,) Layla, bless her soul, stayed in bed with me most days and just watched TV. Needless to say the week, as well as Christmas, went by in a blur. Here I am, on the other side, totally depressed it is over. I feel like I didn't get to sit and soak it up. I feel, well, I feel like I missed Christmas.
I hate this side of the holiday. I've never been a big New Year's person either. This whole week always depresses me. So much so that I end up taking things down rather quickly because looking at them is a reminder that it is over. Needless to say, our house is 99% de-Christmased with the exception of the tree, which will come down tonight. (sigh) Ba Humbug. As more and more decorations came off the walls, I also realized how bare our walls are without the decorations. We moved so quickly and the holidays were upon us that there was no time to decorate walls! I threw up the Christmas decorations and voila! Now I need to find some pieces to make it home. As I put things away, I am also reminded that next year these love bugs will be a year older. Cameron will be talking. As I put away Mr. Snoring Santa Claus, I think about what Cam might say next year when we take him out. I think about how Layla loves the decorations and thinks everything is so beautiful. She'll be a whole year older and I hope she will still have that magical Christmas spirit about her. I think about how Hannah will be eight. EIGHT! She is just at the cusp of starting to not believe. How is that possible? My baby girl? WHAT? I pray that she will always believe. I pray that she wont ever lose the spirit of Christmas.
How is it that the time flies by so quickly and as much as I try to sit and soak up every moment with these blessings of mine, I still feel like I am missing so much. As if I haven't taken enough time to just sit and be with them. Instead I am barking orders and asking them to clean up or asking Layla to please remove the Crayola Wonder Crayon from Cameron's ear as she is currently sticking it in. Hurry up kids, lets go. Coats on, shoes on, we have to get to work. We have to go here. We have to go there. Cameron, please stop writing on the walls. Hannah don't push your sister. I know this is all part of like. Part of being an adult. Part of being a parent. Yet so badly, I just want more time. More time with them this little. More time with them before they lose their innocence. These years are so precious to me and I am just not willing to let them go. Make it last forever... no?
All this being said, I did enjoy as much of the holiday as I could considering how sick I was. The kids had a blast opening their gifts and the family over for our first Christmas in the new/old house, made it quite memorable. It is so much fun to finally see some boys toys in the house these days. There are trucks everywhere! What made my Christmas truly perfect was having the front door open and seeing Uncle Donny and Auntie Leslie walk through my front door. The sugar butts from Tennessee surprised us all and made our Christmas wonderful. It was exactly what I needed and it was the perfect touch on the day. You could take everything away but my family... I need my family and this Christmas, it was pure awesomeness to be surrounded by them all.
Be it as it may, time does go on and soon enough 2012 will be here. I have big plans for 2012. Many new resolutions and promises to make and keep. I am looking forward to a new year with new hope and a new outlook. I wish everyone nothing short of a wonderful year full of hope, happiness and good health.
Happy New Year!
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