Christmas is only SIX days away! I cant believe how quickly these months just fly by and how I have so very little time to get to this computer and write! I really do miss it as it always serves as my therapy in many cases as well. I am missing a lot of things lately. First and foremost, my friends. Things have been a little stressful lately and I have been really backing away from them when the truth is that I need them now more than ever. My family has been faced with a situation that we never thought imaginable and I have found myself in a caregiver role for someone that I love with all my heart. Everything has changed and some days I am okay with that, while others I am so not. It has been quite the emotional ride so far and truth be told, I really don't want to drag my friends into that. I can only put up a front for so long and when people ask me how I am, I truthfully want to scream that I am an emotional mess. That I don't understand why this happening. Yet, I don't and instead I say, "Things are good," because in all honesty, I don't want to bog people down with this. Or I don't respond at all. I am having a tough time handling it all as well as taking care of the children and Holiday gatherings. Moreover, I drive myself insane thinking about what this next year will bring as it pertains to this situation. I do apologize to my friends for sort of sliding off the radar. I don't expect you all to understand, but I truly hope you will.
There is a flip side to all of this and that is what I am really trying to grasp onto. I know that there are no guarantees in life and so I am trying to snatch up every single moment that I can with my family. This year more than ever, I am taking time to stop and take everything in. I'm making memories with my family and cherishing them with all my heart. I am thanking the Lord above for giving me all the good in my life because this is what certainly offsets the bad. I have these three beautiful babies that I truly cant get enough of. I love the magic this season brings and watching them squeal in delight about all the excitement that comes along with the Holidays. So even though there are bad days, there are so many more good days that I cant imagine my life without. And at the end of a bad day, I have my husband and children to snuggle up to and savour. I know that I am fortunate and that things could be so much worse. Some days it is just harder to remember that than others.
Billy and I are hosting Christmas dinner this year. Although I am a little nervous about trying to get all of my tasks done, I am so very excited to be having it here. Thrilled that my kids can be home the entire day and overjoyed to have the family all together around our dining room table. We are truly hoping to make this a tradition as I would most definitely like to host Christmas each year. As we speak, the dining room has been disassembled so that we can paint and switch the rooms up. I am very excited to see the end product as I think the layout is going to give us more room to entertain and just make it homier for our family gathering.
Shopping is DONE! Most of it is wrapped and I am just waiting for a few more things to trickle in by mail. I am beyond excited to see the kids faces this year. To watch Cameron experience his first Christmas at 6 months old. I can't wait to see the girls faces light up with their surprises and I am so itching to be able to play with them for hours over the coming weekend! I have to say, I have always been someone who enjoyed "giving" in the spirit of Christmas.
The health report is as follows:
Hannah successfully had her 4th ear tube surgery two weeks ago when the bad ear tube was taken out and a new one put in. She did very well with the surgery and only had a few issues with getting sick afterwards. She has her follow-up tomorrow and I am very curious to see what he says as she has not been herself this past week. I am also questioning a possible UTI for her because something is just off in regards to her and her behavior. Layla has been doing great after her last asthma attack. I am sensing a cold coming on but hoping the inhalers and singulair keep it at bay and we don't have any flare ups. Cameron has been a bit of a fuss budget and I am seriously wondering if he has yet another ear infection. We are going to try and ride it out as I have done some research and have learned that most ear infections are viral and will go away without antibiotics. I really don't want him on antibiotics three times in less than 5 weeks.. so hopefully it will clear up without incident. There is always a possibility that he could be cutting teeth as well..so we shall see. All in all, pretty quiet on the home front as it pertains to their health. I'll take it!
Please don't be offended if you did not receive a Christmas card from us this year! It was impossible to get the kids to pose for one. I tried three days in a row and then gave up. Maybe I will get lucky this week and I will be able to send out New Year's card!
I don't think I will have a moment between now and Christmas to get here and type so I will sign off by saying, Have yourself a merry little Christmas and God Bless!
