Never Grow Up

This will go down in the books as being my all time favorite song

"Never Grow Up"

Taylor Swift

Your little hands wrapped around my finger

And it's so quiet in the world tonight

Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming

So I tuck you in and turn on your favorite nightlight

To you, everything's funny

You got nothing to regret

I'd give all I have honey

If you could stay like that

Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

Just stay this little

Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

It could stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you

Wont let no one break your heart

No one will desert you

Just try to never grow up

Never grow up

You're in the car on the way to the movies

And you're mortified your mama's dropping you off

At 14, there's just so much you can't do

And you can't wait to move out someday and call your own shots

But don't make her drop you off around the block

Remember that she's getting older too

And don't lose the way that you dance

around in your PJs getting ready for school

Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

Just stay this little

Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow

It could stay this simple

No one's ever burned

Nothing's ever left you scarred

Even though you want to, just try to never grow up

Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room

Memorize what is sounded like what your dad gets home

Remember the footsteps, remember the words said

And all your little brother's favorite songs

I just realized everything I had is someday gonna be gone

So here I am in my new apartment

In a big city, they just dropped me off

It's so much colder than I thought it would be

So I tuck myself in and turn my nightlight on

Wish I'd never grown up

I wish I'd never grown up

Oh I don't wanna grow up

Wish I'd never grown up

Could still be little

Oh I don't wanna grow up

It could still be simple

Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

Just stay this little

Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

It could stay this simple

Won't let nobody hurt you

Won't let no one break your heart

And even though you want to,

please try to never grow up

Don't you ever grow up

Just never grow up

We Miss You Pete! xoxoxo

This article was written about our dear friends, Pete, Tammi and Miss Brenna. You can visit the link to see the video.

http://www.projo.com/news/content/THE_HOMEFRONT_12-30-10_OCLL39F_v14.426c05.html


War hits home for family of newly deployed captain from R.I. National Guard / Video
08:32 AM EST on Thursday, December 30, 2010
By Tom MooneyJournal Staff Writer
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SMITHFIELD –– On a snowy evening, the Christmas lights shine outside Tammi Lawrence’s home. A tree stands in the family room. A tray of goodies, from Tammi’s cookie swap at work, awaits someone’s attention at the kitchen counter. But look closer.
Something’s awry.
That’s Tammi dragging out the trash barrel and recycling bin to the curb. She hates that chore the most. And that’s her father-in-law pulling into the driveway every morning. He takes 4-year-old Brenna to preschool and has promised to clear the walk this winter with the snowblower he’s dropped off. During the big post-Christmas snowfall a family friend interceded and “plowed and shoveled me out,” she said.
Look at those outside lights again. That’s half what Peter Lawrence usually hangs for Christmas. Haven’t seen him around. And the Christmas tree? Brenna complains it’s short this year and fake. She wants a big, real fir.
Extra
R.I. National Guard fights battles abroad and at home
“When Daddy gets home,” Tammi has had to tell her daughter.
Until then, she explains, “we’re trying to do everything simple.” You have to when “you’re the only one.”
A new year dawns and with it Tammi Lawrence is learning to deal with new, painful emotions.
Two protracted wars drag into a new decade with scant notice from many Americans. She’s no longer one of them.
In September, her husband, Peter Lawrence, 35, a captain with the National Guard’s 103rd Field Artillery Battalion, deployed for the first time, something he’d been wanting and something Tammi hoped would never happen.

Tammi Lawrence is managing Christmas alone in Smithfield this year with daughter, Brenna, age 4, while her husband, Peter, is deployed in Kuwait with the Rhode Island Army National Guard’s 103rd Field Artillery Battalion. The Providence Journal / John Freidah
Like that, war reached their threshold.
“This war has been going on for years and to me, people are numb to it,” she says. “Unless you’re in it, I mean.”
“We’re no different from other [deployed] families,” she says. “But it’s new to me so I feel like I’m the only person.”
She feels worse for Peter. “I have my daughter, I have my family. He just went through a sad period of not seeing his daughter. He really misses her.” And there’s little solace in finding distractions beyond his Kuwaiti headquarters: “There’s no trees, no water. All there is is desert as far as you can see.”
Some 50,000 troops remain in Iraq. Many are supported through supply lines stretching back into Kuwait. Captain Lawrence, whose grandfather flew P-47 fighters over Europe in World War II, whose father served in the Army during Vietnam, directs security missions for those truck convoys. He loves his job. He’s served in the Guard since he was a teenager.
Two years ago he took a risk and opened his own small Nationwide insurance agency in North Providence. While he set off to build a business, Tammi went about being a school nurse at Wilbur Elementary in Somerset, Mass.
“We worked and then we did our home stuff together,” says Tammi, “and we didn’t pay attention to that” — the war.
Then word came. The Lawrences had nine months to plan before their lives turned upside down.
Peter trained a good friend to run his new business. His dedicated secretary still refuses to take a day off. Nationwide called the office the other day asking what it could do to help Tammi at home. The company made arrangements to help with the oil bill.
Tammi and Peter e-mail daily. They use Skype often, seeing and talking to each other through computers. On weekends, Tammi sets up the computer at Peter’s parents so they can see their son, too.
Technology keeps them all connected but reminds them, too, of the distance between them; eight more months on Peter’s deployment.
Members of a family support group told Tammi that “you will notice that people just don’t think it’s a big deal that your husband is away.” That has come true on occasion, she says.
“It’s really bizarre. They’ll say, ‘How’re you doing’ and that’s it. But everyone is busy with their own lives. So I don’t think they know what to do. I don’t even know what I want them to do –– besides take out my trash,” she says, laughing.
Peter took care of the outdoor chores, the car-oil changes, the shoveling. She handled things inside. Now she tries to do both.
Not long ago little Brenna watched her friend being picked up by her father. “Please pick me,” she asked. “Pick me up, too.”
Nights are the hardest for them both. Too much time to think about him gone.
Now rather than brace for Brenna’s crying, Tammi has devised a new routine: they make popcorn together and then play the Candy Land board game over and over until they’re both sleepy.
No war news enters Tammi’s house, no pictures of soldiers in uniform. “We do a lot of Christmas specials here.”
The family set an empty seat for Peter at Thanksgiving. His dress uniform coat hung from the back of a chair. Three framed photographs sat among the silverware and plates: Peter in fatigues, with his rifle slung over his shoulder; Peter holding Brenna when she was 2; a family portrait of the three of them on vacation.
Peter called precisely at 2 p.m. local time as the family was preparing to sit down. Everyone got a chance to talk to him.
“It was tough for everybody,” says Tammi, “but we got through it.”
Peter’s parents arrived at the house at 6 a.m. Christmas morning. T-Mobile loaned Tammi a laptop so Peter could Skype and watch his daughter open presents under that small, artificial tree.
“We’ll do it up big next year,” Tammi says.
Meantime, Peter is scheduled to come home on leave in April.
Brenna is already asking how many days away is that. …Tomorrow? Her parents are gently reminding her it’s only for a few days. Then Daddy’s going back to work.
And Tammi will still be taking out that trash barrel.
tmooney@projo.com

Happy New Year

Well we have somehow found ourselves on the other side of the Holidays and here it is January, 2011! Our Christmas was spectacular! Once I got to 4pm on Christmas Eve, everything just went so smoothly. We went to Christmas Eve Mass and then up to Foxboro to visit with my mother's side of the family. It's always a treat to see my Pepere and it was especially nice to meet my new cousin, baby Isabelle. From there we went to my sister in laws and got to visit with Billy's mother's side of the family. I don't think we got home before 10:30! Yet, for once it didn't matter because I knew we had NOWHERE to go on Christmas day and what a fabulous gift in itself that was!



I awoke at 7:oo am Christmas morning to three snoring kids. I tried to fall back to sleep but in all honesty.. I was way too excited and bewildered that the kids were actually still sleeping! So I lay there for about a half hour before I went downstairs and put all the Christmas lights on and the Christmas music. I came back upstairs trying to make as much noise as possible and yet.. not a single one stirred! by 7:45 I couldn't wait any longer and I went into Hannah's room and gave her a kiss. She woke up, looked at me for a millisecond and then hopped out of bed in one leap and started heading for the stairs! I laughed and told her she had to help me wake the others first.



Their faces were priceless as they scanned over all of their gifts. The very moment I had been waiting for. The girls adore their Barbie Mansion and have yet to go an hour without playing with it. Cameron was actually unwrapping his own gifts at age 6 months! Granted he was trying to eat whatever paper he could get to his mouth... but still.. he has such good coordination already. To keep tradition alive I had also prepared my mother's Christmas Breakfast Braid, for the first time. Just the smell of it put me back to when we were kids and how wonderful our Christmas mornings would be. I am so grateful to have three, gorgeous children to carry on these family traditions. We had such a lovely, laid back morning that I didn't want it to end. There was no rushing around or hurrying into showers. I was able to take it all in and I can assure you that it felt so very good.



Our guests began to arrive around 2pm. This too ran so perfectly. There was no rush to sit down to eat or to get through courses. My turkey ... ohhhh it came out unbelievable! I have NEVER tasted a turkey so good. (To be honest, Billy actually went back to BJ's the day after Christmas to try and get another because all 20lbs of that bird went!) The dinner was just scrumptious. By mid-day I could tell the girls were starting to get watery eyes and sniffles and they quickly changed into their jammies, took some Tylenol and were able to carry on in the festivities. It was so perfect to have the family gathered around at our home. It is surely a memory I will cherish forever and I look forward to hosting many more Christmas dinners.



The day after Christmas I had Baby Aria's Baptism. What a beautiful ceremony and a beautiful Church. It was so wonderful to see baby Aria, Sara and Ethan and I even got to meet my girlfriend Val's new little Josephine. She is a doll! Her Gabriel is also getting so big so quickly. Cameron came with me to Church and he was so very good. So glad that I could be a part of that special day. As the snow came in we went on over to my parents to exchange gifts and spend time together and I think I even got to take a 20 minute snooze!



From there it all went down hill. The kids all ended up sick and so did I. I made it to work on Tuesday and then from there on out, I couldn't move. Everything hurt. To be honest, everything still hurts. The kids all had fevers, sore throats, chest coughs, drippy noses and my whole body just ached. It had to have been the flu as we barely got off the couch all week. Today is the first day I have managed to wear normal clothes and get my butt to work, although I am still feeling miserable. I have an appointment after work to get checked and I am hoping to get to the bottom of whatever this is and feel better! I feel so guilty for not being able to do anything fun and exciting with the kids during school break. Yet, at the same time I was so grateful for the rest and cuddles with them.



Yesterday I dusted off my "Deceptively Delicious" cookbook and I have vowed to get my family eating healthy with the proper fruits and vegetables. I am hoping that eating the right nutrients and a well balanced diet will help to keep the entire family healthy and germ free. I have to start somewhere and eating right needs to be it. The next thing we are adding on will be exercising again.



On an extremely sad note, my brother in law Dan's father passed away last Thursday very unexpectedly. I am still in shock as it was just on Christmas Eve that I had seen him last. It doesn't make sense and I can only imagine how Dan feels. He was such a sweet, full of life, type of person with the most amazing, twinking blue eyes I have ever seen. On Christmas Eve I went into Dan and Leanne's family room to greet him and his wife Jean and I was teasing them about being all cozy romantic on the couch by the fire. I just can't believe that less than a week later, he is gone. I am keeping the entire DeMarco Family in my prayers. My Faith tells me that he is in a better place, watching his family from above. May God Bless this entire family and help them through this terrible loss.