It's been hard for me to come here lately.  So many things I want to write about, so many things I simply cant write about.  This is usually my place to let everything out.  To get it out and then heal..and right now I can't do that and I am having a difficult time dealing with that.  So instead I have avoided "the blog" altogether.  It's funny, usually around this point in life I can hear my father saying in my head, "and this too shall pass."  All I can say now is to take your health seriously.  There are no greater gifts than that of good health and time.  Recognize that.  You never know when this could change.  Embrace it and live each day to the fullest.

This being said, I do feel so guilty "complaining" when I know that there are others out there dealing with horrible instances as well.  I am so blessed to have this life growing every day inside of me.  He or she is my miracle and I need to keep my mind focused on that and the gift I have been given.  I am blessed to have my wonderful girls and a wonderful husband who has truly been putting up with the "yucky" me lately.  I am blessed to have my family and I dont know what I would do without my dear sister.  I cant begin to explain how very much I am looking forward to spending this summer down the beach with my family.  I am determined to enjoy every little minute with them and I just know that the girls are going to dub this summer as their best one yet!

The girls are doing well.  Trying to get Layla healthy has been a challenge.  She had RSV a couple of weeks back and then got hit with it again this week.  It is terrible and she is on the age cusp of it not being that bad.  I cant imagine the newborns and infants that have dealt with this.  I seriously stay up all night listening to her breath because of all the wheezing and that horrible strained cough.  With having severe asthma myself, I know that cough all to well.  It's the one you get when you are not taking in enough air and it scares the ever living life out of me!  Thankfully she seems to be on the mend now and I am hoping.. no I am PRAYING that we can all get a good night's sleep tonight since I dont remember the last time I have slept more than an hour or two at a time. 

Hannah tried skiing for the first time last weekend up in New Hampshire.  That kid will never cease to amaze me.  Anything she can get her hands into she seems to just excel at.  She came right down that hill like a champ and of course loved every minute of it.  She truly is quite the athletic little bugger and I know she is going to do such wonderful things in life.

I am going to leave with a poem that my Dad had given me when I was a kid.  I had been studying my butt off for High School exams and I was stressed.  I walked in my room one morning after my shower and on my pillow was a plaque that read this:

"Don't Quit"



When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,


When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,


When the funds are low and the debts are high,


And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,


When care is pressing you down a bit


Rest if you must, but don't you quit.






Life is queer with its twists and its turns,


As everyone of us sometimes learns,


And many a failure turns about


When they might have won, had they stuck it out.


Don't give up though the pace seems slow,


You may succeed with another blow.






Success is failure turned inside out


The silver tint of the clouds of doubt


And you never can tell how close you are,


It may be near when it seems so far;


So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit,


It's when things seem worst that you must not quit!







I love you Dad! xoxoxo

Thank You

Thank you
Keith Urban

There were nights where I was sure

I wouldnt see the morning sun

And there were dyas that seemed so dark

I couldnt wait for night to come

I couldn't stand to think about how

My life used to be

And how without a single warning

It all slipped away from me

Like a fool I thought I could fight

The shadows on my own

To the dark I was no stranger

But this was stronger than I'd known

And by the time I knew that I

was in too deep I'd gone too far

And the light that used to guide me

Had faded from my heart

And I found myself in places

I thought I'd never go

Surrounded by stangers I was

so far away from home

And I don't know how you found me

All I know is I owe everything to you,

 Yes I do

And I thank you for my heart

I thank you for my life

And I thank god for grace and mercy

And that you became my wife

I'm seeing for the first time

The stars, the sun and moon

But they've got nothing on the power

Of this love I have for you

And I thank you, thank you

Now people say they'll

never stand beside you

They swear they never leave

But when the rain started falling

You know it only fell on me

When all I felt was so much

pain and guilt and shame

I couldn't even as for help

I don't know if I believe in other lives

But when you came

There was something so familar

About the way you said my name

And the whole world started turning

And I swear that I'd been

born again brand new

And it's all because of you

And I've seen so many things

That I just can't explain

But the miracle of miracles is how

With your love I was saved

And I thank you for my heart

I thank you for my life

I thank god for grace and mercy

And that you became my wife

The day I started breathing

Was the day you took my hand

And 'til the day I die Baby

I'll forever be your man

And I thank you, I thank you