Most days I feel like being a mommy is the best medicine a girl could have. Yes, my kids run me ragged and can raise my stress level to an unchartable amount but these children can also give me an enormous amount of love and affection. To see their little minds work and hear how they talk, how they learn, how they love.. is quite possibly for me, the biggest reward, heart filler, I will ever get. I sat down at Layla's preschool this week to have a Mother's Day breakfast with her. She couldn't do enough for me and got the biggest kick out of waiting on me. I think we gave each other a million hugs and kisses that morning and I left that school with my heart full.
I've also been trying to have a little more patience with Cameron. Oh.. he is tough.. lol.. but I have been taking a step back and watching his little mind work and appreciating it. Appreciating the fact that he is a wild man because one day that little wild man is going to do great things with all his bountiful of energy!
Hannah has had a great week and has only bared her grizzly attitude a few times. She has been a lot of help this week and takes such good care of Layla and Cam. She'll step right in and help out with them whenever they need tending too. She also shocked me by giving me a kiss this morning before she left the car to walk into the play yard. I have been asking her for two weeks and today, she did it without me asking. All the other times she would roll her eyes and say "no" while she quickly exited the car... but today.. KISS! I hope someday when she reads this she'll realize just how much that one kiss meant to her mommy!
I have been having a lot of flashbacks of the girls in their younger years. I dont know if it is the fact that the birthdays are just around the corner.. but Hannah especially.. I have these pictures of them that I had taken stuck in my head. One when Hannah was 2 or 3 and we went to Gallilee. She was prancing on the beach in her gray Block Island sweatshirt... with a pink bow practically taped to her scalp with no hair. Layla, when she fell asleep sitting in the high chair with Pastena all over her face. And then I get scared when I really try to remember what they were like at certain ages and it gets harder and harder for me to recall. I'm trying to remember when it was just Hannah.. what were bath times like? I do remember that was the time I would take with her to teach her new things. Like her letters, her name, songs, etc.. You Are My Sunshine.. lol But what were our conversations? Did she tell me she loved me all the time? It's even harder to remember the times when it was just me and the girls. I remember the beginnings of it.. but that's really all. sigh... is it the exhaustion? I feel like I could nod off at any point throughout the day. I really don't get a good night's sleep.. maybe that's why I function in Zombie mode most days? I can't imagine how comatose I would be if it weren't for caffeine.. my SwingJuice. etc..
My Layla baby (yes she is 5 and I will always call her my baby-lol) has also been having some more GI issues. I didnt think it was much before and kind of just let it go, however, the issues have been more and more frequent and I am starting to think that her Eosinophilic Esophagitis is having a flare up. She had been doing so well that I almost forgot she was diagnosed with it a few years back. She started gaining weight, came off the million dollar formula and started growing. Billy and I started connecting the dots and counting the times she has had issues and have written down what she ate prior. Something is up. Be it the seasonal allergies (which are horrific this year and I am ready to scratch my eyeballs out despite taking meds) or the fact that there may be a new food allergy present.... We head up to Boston Childrens in 2 weeks to figure it all out. I am dreading the endoscopy.. dreading it. But we will do what we have to in order to get my girl feeling her best!
Alright.. Im off to go enjoy my time... xo
No comments:
Post a Comment