The swing of things

Well I will say that I had a productive weekend whipping the house into shape and getting organized for this school year.  There is still much more to do, but at least I started making progress!  I made the girls a little homework center where they can store their homework until it is finished and ready to be handed in.  Otherwise it tends to get lost in the shuffle of the mail and I am often searching frantically for it the night before.  Now they each have a folder, an array of writing utensils and paper for when they need it. 

I also got into Layla's drawers and began to go through her clothes.  With her it's difficult because she is still so tiny that a 3T still fits her.  Because she is tall however, the 4T fits her length but tends to be baggy in other areas.  So I tend to hold on to the smaller sizes and just pair it with leggins.  Thankfully this allows her many different options and we seriously love our hand me downs from Ant Denise.  I got into her flower basket as well.  We often tend to lose our favorite hair flowers and I am always searching everywhere for them.  I decided to organize them as best I could by clipping them to a long ribbon.  So much easier to find the color we want and Layla loves to be able to pick them out on her own in the mornings now.  Flowers are her trademark.  If you ask someone if they know her, they often say, "Oh the cute little girl with the flower?"  She still hardly has hair, so this is a must have accessory for us and one that I just feel is part of her and her personality.  She is my foofy flower baby girl!  I didn't realize the magnitude of my obsession with them until I began stringing them on the ribbon and actually seeing how many we have.  Slightly obsessed?

I also hung up ribbon for their school artwork.  They come home with so many beautiful pictures and projects that my fridge is just not big enough to display it all.  SO we created this ....

Monday, we ended up having a fabulous time after school.  I decided to not let my worry about dinner and getting it served on time bother me and I just ignored the fact that I needed to cook all together.  We got home, unpacked our bags and headed outside.  We played on the swing set.  We played ball.  Hannah and I played soccer and Layla became the hero when we kicked the ball over the fence into the neighbors yard.  Because she is a tiny bit, I was able to lower her over the fence to get it! LOL  It was so much fun just to let loose and play!  Cameron had a blast in the swing and the crazy man even goes down the slide and cracks up the whole way.  We came in at 5:30 and I somehow managed to put together a meal by 6:00.  It wasn't half bad either!  Steak Stir fry with white rice!  The best part was that the kids ATE it!  We are trying to get out of our macaroni and cheese, hot dog, hamburger, pasta every night routine.  I am trying to cook one meal.  One HEALTHY meal and have the whole family eat it.  This can be tough.  But I am on a mission!  They need to learn to eat healthy NOW and I need to be their example.  Here goes nothing!


Tuesdays.  Tuesdays are suppose to be my "day-off",  I can tell you that it is anything but a day off!  LOL  When I think of having a day off, I think about being lazy to wake.  I think about making breakfast for the kids but being able to make them something special like homemade waffles or pancakes.  I think about relaxing but doing something fun with the kids.  Slow moving day full of sunshine and rainbows.  Apparently, I live inside my head too much because that is SO not what my Tuesdays are like!  Instead, it's the hustle and bustle of getting the banana off to school, running to pick up Mom and then we are tossed into a whirl wind of "in the car, buckle car seats, out of the car, unbuckle car seats.  Running errands and going to eh market.  Layla dances from 1:00 - 2:00.  This is Cameron's nap time so we usually spend the hour chasing after him.  Then I drive around and try and get him to fall asleep in the car before we pick up Hannah from school.  Usually this is to no avail and Layla falls asleep instead.  We pick up Hannah from school and then go home to figure out dinner.  I make enough to send home with my parents and enough for my in laws to eat since they had to watch the kids this week while I had a 6:00PM appointment.  The glitch was that Hannah has dance from 5:00 - 6:30, so I drop her off and then come back to get the table set before I drop off Mom and head to my appointment.  My mother in law picks up Hannah from dance.. and so on until it is 10:00PM and I am completely exhausted!  Although.. dinner didn't come out too badly considering....

I did get to spend some time with Ana this week though and I just love this time we spend together.  I swear we could talk for hours.  I put the kids to bed and headed over to her house where we literally sat and talked for nearly four hours.  We sit outside in a stress free environment and just hash out life's problems.  The more I get to know her, the more I see how similar we are.  I am blessed to have her in my life and I swear God sent her to me at this crucial point when I really needed someone to make me feel like I haven't lost all my marbles.  Thank you Ana for "getting me".  For making me feel somewhat normal and for loving me for who I am. 

Hockey starts this weekend for Hannah and I am so excited to see her skate again.  I feel like it has been forever.  Billy took her to get some new gear since the squirt has outgrown everything!  Mommy's thrilled that she has a new helmet to wear as well.  I am anxious to see where she places and even more anxious to hopefully see her play some games this season.  I think Sunday will determine where we stand with all of that.  I am a little hesitant to see how many days a week it will tie up, but I am also excited to see her continue to excel at this sport. 

This is a picture of Layla's Family Project.  I think Hannah and I had more fun creating it than Layla did, but it certainly came out in the famous Layla style!  It's all about PURPLE!

This is a picture of Hannah from last weekend.  Auntie Jill, her personal shopper always tends to buy her EXACTLY what she loves to wear.  Uncle Dave and I agree that she often looks more like Elton John circa 1980... but just the same... I let her be who she wants to be... within reason of course.

Last but not least, here is a picture of the crazy, little Cameroni!  God I love him!  Even though I spend most of the day frantically chasing after him while trying to say a firm "NO"!  To which he laughs at me and continues to do the thing I am telling him not to do!  LOL

It's just me and the Ravioli at the office today and I am soaking her up.  The kid has had me in stitches most of the day.  Her current favorite songs are "I want to go all the way" by Brittany (oh boy), the oldie but goodie, "Who let the dogs out"  (she seriously makes me replay and replay it) and Foster the People's, "Pumped up Kicks."  She just decided that I must wear her flower and stuck it on my head....  my little booger..

 
I hope everyone enjoys the rest of their week.  Remember... September is National Childhood Cancer Awareness Month!  GIVE BACK!  It will warm your heart!  I promise!

Dancing in September

I can finally feel things beginning to calm down.  It feels good.  We had a good weekend.  We tried to do as many things as we could to just feel "normal" in between the chaos and I do believe it helped.  I picked the kids up from school on Friday and I don't think Layla could have been more excited to see me.  She jumped up from her nap mat and threw her arms around me and practically cried from excitement.  I get so much love from this boog.  We went to pick up Hannah and I let the kids play at the school playground for a little while since the weather was nice.  We then went home and the girls helped me make meatballs.  Flat meatballs per Layla's request.  Not sure where that one came from but we had a pot full of flat meatballs for dinner time becasue Layla said so! LOL  I also made a lasagna and it felt so good to just be home, cooking with the girls.  I let them stay up late and we snuggled in bed together and watched Nemo. 

Saturday we woke up with no crazy morning schedule.  Ahhh it felt good!  We took our time and I made the girls homemade waffles.  We got to be lazy and I loved every minute of it.  By mid morning we headed over to Nonnie and Papa's and continued the packing and unpacking.  The kids were a bit restless and I tried my best to keep them entertained while helping Mom and Dad.  I feel bad for them under these circumstances because it is not their fault.  They are bored and want my attention.  I find it sometimes difficult to split my attention under these circumstances where I am trying to be there for Mom and Dad and yet be a mother to my kids.  We left around 4 and I headed home to jump in the shower before heading down the beach to do a photo shoot.  Billy made it home from work just in time to watch Cameron and the girls and I drove down to our RCB for the first time since Hurricane Irene hit.  Thankfully the beach was still in tact as was our little piece of heaven.  I fed the girls and then hit the beach to do a fun family shoot for our beach friends the Kanaczet Family.  I got some great shots of this adorable family!  I hope they like them as much as I do!  After the shoot we headed over to Patsy and Oj's for a drink and then off to see SANTA!  Yes, Santa was at the beach in September.  It was very cute and the first time I have been down there for this event.  The kids were excited and Hannah got to ask for her electric guitar and Layla her drums.  (God help our house come December 25th!)  Layla also got to tell Santa she loved him.  I wish Cam were with us because I would have loved to see his reaction.  We hit the road home late and the girls fell fast asleep in the car. 

Sunday I left the kids with Billy for a little while so I could run and help my parents some more.  Pack, unpack, throw out, pack, unpack, throw out.  God help me come the day that I have to move.  Years and years of memories we went through.  SO many things I had forgotten about but were reminded of while packing.  So many little trinkets that would spark memories of the holidays and gatherings at my parent's house.  I realize how very blessed I was to have the upbringing that I had.  I have all good memories of my childhood.  My parents made sure of it.  I helped for a few hours and then headed back home to get my own house together for my nieces, sister and brother in law.  I had asked them to come by for a small cookout and really just to continue to do the things that keep my stress level down and feel normal.  I put together a macaroni salad and Billy ran to get some hot dogs and hamburgers and we grilled ourselves up a little meal.  The girls had a blast playing with their cousins and Billy and I enjoyed spending some family time with Leanne and Dan.  The girls play so well together and I love having them at our house so we asked Leanne if we could keep them overnight and we got to have a cousins sleepover!  So darn cute they are.  I made them more waffles Monday morning and just got to be silly with them before it was time for me to head back over to Nonnie and Papa's to keep going on the moving.  I told Julie we should open our own moving company after this.  JK Moving Company... and we aren't kidding.  She didn't laugh.  LOL  We are almost there.  They are almost entirely moved.  Things are almost back to "normal" if they were ever normal to begin with.

The girls started dance yesterday.  I feel like the show was just yesterday, but here we were back in the swing of things.  It felt good and the girls seemed to enjoy their classes.  Layla is now in an hour class and I was delighted with how well she paid attention.  Hopefully the dynamic of this group will keep her focused!  Hannah's class is now an hour and a half and she has added jazz to the mix.  She was so excited to now own jazz shoes.  She did great and I was glad to see that her dance friend Mackenzie is back in the group!  Sp both girls now have their classes on Tuesdays which will leave the weekends open for Hannah's hockey.  Let the crazy sports calendar begin!!!  Poor Cam!  We've got to find something for him soon!

I can't believe that we are here in September.  One of my favorite months.  I can't help but say the word and automatically sing, "Do you remember, 21st night of September, Love was changing the mind of pretenders, while chasing the clouds away," by Earth, Wind and Fire. You know what else is so special about September?  It's National Childhood Cancer Awareness Month!  Yes it is!  You all know how passionate I am about helping to find a cure for many childhood cancers.  I am going to continue to be passionate about finding a cure as long as I am on this planet and I am asking for your help as well.  PLEASE consider making a donation.  The smallest amount WILL HELP!  My three favorite donation sites you can find here in honor of Layla Grace Marsh , Ronan Thompson and Michael Cotrone.  These two little angels and cancer warrior are the sole reason why I have decided to light a fire under my butt and get out there and raise awareness.  Maybe you could order a bracelet or even just SPREAD THE WORD!  Throw it up on your facebook status or Tweet about it.  Anything at all... will go a great ways and help save children's lives!  There are so many things you can do to put a smile on a child's face who may be suffering from this disease!  Hannah has been collecting soda tabs all on her own to bring to Hasbro to help raise money for their child cancer ward.  We also put together a bin of toys that we plan to take over to the hospital as well.  These simple things make a difference.. they truly do!  So please jump on board with me and help spread the word this September! 

I'd like to leave with a note to each of my babies letting them know how grateful and thankful I am for them in my life.  They are what get me out of bed every morning.  My three tiny (okay maybe not so tiny anymore) miracles.....

     Cameron.  You are just plain NUTS!  Crazy nuts!  I say this in a good way and I am not complaining at all.  I just have never known either of your sisters to be as crazy as you!  You are all over the place and into everything that most days I find myself running in 3 different directions to just try and keep up with you.  You now try and do pull ups onto the kitchen table.  You are attempting to climb on top of the stove and Daddy found you out in the driveway after taking his eyes off of you for 30 seconds. (SCARY) You opened the front door and walked out!  God bless your 13.5 month old soul!  You are going to be my adventure seeker.. I can see it already.  I love to watch you shape into this little baby boy who is so determined and stubborn.  At the same time you love to laugh, giggle and bang your head into mine, which is your official way of showing me love.  LOL.  I love you baby boy.  I love you for you.  I love you for completing our family and making us a family of five.   I love you crazy!

     Layla.  My Layla cakes.  How lonely these days are without you at the office.  I miss you so much.  I wish you were here with me.  Yet I know you are where you belong.  I have to accept it and try and get my fill of love and hugs from you during the evenings.  Which you thankfully give me plenty of.  You are such a joyful, funny child that I am often laughing at your antics.  You're silly and you're my love bug at the same time.  I love my time at night with you when everyone else is sleeping and the two of us are up giggling and talking.  When you tell me that I'm the bestest Mommy in the whole wide world and how much you love me.  I can tell you are growing up on me, but I am also holding on to that part of you that is still my little Layla baby.  There is still a part of you that loves to be babied and I will take that for as long as I can get it.  I look forward to our Tuesdays and Thursdays when you are here with me.  I can't believe that you are soon approaching your 4th birthday.  How quickly time flies.  I can still remember those first few days with you wrapped up in your purple blanket in the hospital... it seems like just yesterday.  I love you my Layla bug.  My clone.  I love you to infinity and beyond!

     Hannah banana meatball.  SECOND GRADE.  You are in second grade.  How did that happen?  You are so old and mature to me now.  So independent and eccentric.  You march to the beat of a different drummer and I love that about you.  You are a leader.  You seem to like this year in school and I am hoping that this will be a great year for you.  I don't often worry about you because you are such a strong child.  You are my helper of all helpers.  I love how much you come to my rescue and help me with your brother and sister.  You're my early riser.  You wake up happy and rearing to go.  Last night you told me that you were going to get up earlier than me so that you could make me breakfast.  You have such a sweet side to you.  I find you being a bit more affectionate with me.  Last night, while I was laying with you and Layla, you fell asleep holding my hand again.  I hope that you continue this affection because I eat it up and love to give it in return.  I love you my little Rock Star.. I know you are going to do great things in this life.  I can feel it.  I love you meatball... To the moon and stars and back! 

xo

The girls with Santa...

Some shots of the Kanaczet Family



TGIF - Insert Katy Perry's song here....

We're alive!  It's Friday!  THANK GOD it's FRIDAY!  I don't think I have ever been so excited for a weekend to start.  Not because we have anything fun planned but because this week is OVER!  Goodbye!  Good riddance!  Did I survive the girl's first day of school?  Yes.  Was I an emotional wreck? Yes.  I had all of two minutes to cry and be a mess before I had to head directly into moving my parents who have been without power for 6 days.  By day 2 with a broken generator, my father had enough and decided to move.  For those who don't know, my childhood home is on the market.  My parents have downsized and bought a smaller home.  They had intended to move in little by little, but under the current circumstances and with no power or water at what we now call the "old" house, we set to work.  It has been a grueling few days and to be quite honest, I would like to forget them all together.  I had many emotions about my parents selling my childhood home.  While I understood the reasoning behind the move and support my father 110% in this decision, I always thought that by the time they were ready to sell, we'd be ready to buy it.  Life hasn't worked out that way and it's not in the cards.  I've accepted that and now, the old house no longer even feels like home to me.  I will always keep the memories close to my heart, but in all reality, I don't think I would be able to live there without having certain emotions about the way it was.  It's time to let go and move on.  I can do that.  So organizing, sorting old from new and what will fit, packing, unpacking, loading cars and unloading cars has been filling most of my days this week.  To the point where I got home last night and starting to go through my own kitchen.  How can I sit there and so neatly organize my parent's house when mine is such a disaster? 


I'm at the point now where I just want my parents settled in their new house.  I want them comfortable and organized.  I want some sort of normalcy back.  Julie and I have been working our tushies off to make this happen.  Juggling kids, drop offs, work and whatnot we have somehow managed to move 99% of the house, on our own.  Have I mentioned that I don't know what I would do without her in my life?  If it weren't for each other, I know we would never be able to get through this phase in our lives.  Somehow, together, we are getting through probably one of the most difficult times we will ever have to endure and I will leave it at that.  Aside from Julie, I thank God every day for these beautiful angels he has given me.  They are my life lines.  They are what is good in this life.  I swear to God they were put on this earth to save me.  They are my happiness.  They are everything that is good in my life.  Unfortunately, I have had very little time to spend with them the past two weeks due to all of the chaos that has been going on and it is affecting me.  I miss them.  I want to just sit and play and color and laugh.  I want to play dress up and I want to play ball.  I feel like I am missing out on so much and it has only been two weeks.  Billy had to pick Hannah up from her first day of school on Wednesday and it killed me.  He got to take her to the park even though it was me who had promised to take her.  I want my life back.  I want my time with them back.  I want the hectiness to end.  Now.


Thankfully the girls seem to be adjusting well to school.  Hannah has a wonderful teacher this year and a FANTASTIC new principal.  I got to meet him yesterday and he is a doll.  I get such a good vibe from him and I am praying that this is the turn around year for McGuire Elementary.  Finger's crossed.  I was worried Layla would be upset at drop off today because all summer she kept telling me that I need to drop her off and leave her there.  She got a kick out of telling me this.  Her attempt at being independent I presume and watching what we do when dropping Hannah off at school.  Last night she told me that she would like for me to stay at school with her.  I gulped.  Thankfully though, she was so excited to have Cousin Addy at school with her today that she forgot all about wanting Mommy... even though Mommy would have done anything to get on the floor and play with her at preschool all day.  I think I would have even enjoyed nap time tremendously!  Driving to drop Hannah off afterwards was so weird.  I kept looking at her empty car seat wanting to lose it.  Two other kids and the car and yet I felt so lonely.  After dropping Hannah off it was just Cam and I.  Just the two of us heading into the office together.  All I can say is, Thank God I had a third.  I cant imagine going through this without having him to keep me distracted.  And distracted he certainly keeps me.  The kid is a moose!  He's huge!  He's into EVERYTHING and has quite the temper lately.  VERY strong willed.  He reminds me sooo much of Hannah at this age.  He's like the male version of her!  He seems to be doing okay without his sidekick Layla here to occupy his time.  It's good for us too, to have this alone time as well.... even though I would do anything to have all three by my side.  As I type, he is giving me that toothy grin of his and I just want to eat his face off!


Last night after the kids went to sleep, I ended up going to see my Ana Banana for a bit.  It has been months since we sat and talked.  It was such a nice, crisp evening and I was so grateful for this time with her.  Just chatting away and discussing life.  It made me feel the most normal I have felt in weeks.  Just being there and talking like we use to before the summer got so hectic.  I hope we can continue this tradition!  It's like therapy for me!  I went to bed on the late side and woke up to Hannah climbing in bed with us.  So weird that she has been doing this a bit more lately.  She curled up between Billy and I and went to sleep.  Billy woke up really early for work and found Layla sitting up in her bed.  He carried her to ours and the girls and I curled up and slept.  I cant tell you how much I adore this.  I don't care how tired I am.  Something about this cuddle time with them just melts my heart.  Hannah fell asleep holding my hand and Layla was curled up right into my side with her arms wrapped around me.  I don't think I could have felt more loved.  These are the times I want to remember forever.  I am grateful for every single one of these moments I have with my children...

Happy 3rd Birthday to my niece Addison!  We love you very much dolly!  xoxoxo

And this is why I will be okay....