Dear Lord,

Please keep this man safe

Protect him from harm

Wrap his family in your embrace

Return him to us safely

Peter, thank you for making the ultimate sacrifice to protect us and our Country. We love you and can't wait for your safe return. 364 more days!

Mr. Revis

It is most sincerely with a heavy heart that I sit down to write about this beloved man, Mr. Revis. I was 5 years old when I first met this man named, Costa, Gus, Tony or how I referred to him as, Mr. Revis. I remember then being so confused as to what his name REALLY was since all these names were used so interchangeably when people spoke to him. Sometimes, the same person would use all three in the same sentence when speaking to him or speaking about him! Yet I was 5 years old and his daughter Helen and I had just met in Kindergarten. We didn't know it yet, but Helen and I were going to remain in each other's lives for years to come. Helen introduced me to Tracey and from then on, the three of us nourished a friendship that would last a lifetime.

One of the things that made Helen and my friendship grow was the fact that we were raised very similarly. She, Greek and me, Italian, we both grew up in households where our fathers were quite strict. We were Daddy's little girls and they would do everything in their power to keep us safe and sound. Something Helen and I couldn't quite understand back then, but now that we are adults, raising daughters of our own, we can truly appreciate. Both Mr. Revis and my father ran businesses in the town of Smithfield. Pizza and chicken. Two totally different establishments but Helen and I both saw our Dads work an enormous amount of hours when we were young. We were taught the meaning of a dollar at an early age. We were taught to value these restaurants even though there would come times when I know we would both loathe them. These are just a few of the things that bonded Helen and I together in friendship. At the very root of it all stood my Dad and Mr. Revis. We continued on in school and expanded our group to eventually 3 more. Valerie, Andrea and Sara joined us and for the most part, we were known as the 6 musketeers. The 6 of us will always have some really wonderful memories to look back on and for that I am grateful. I am also grateful that we somehow have remained in each other's lives despite living states apart, raising families and nourishing careers. I think it is safe to say that our bond cant be broken after 30 years of friendship.

Mr. Revis adored Helen in such a way that it was evident in everything that he did. He was always so proud of her and all of her accomplishments and he surely couldn't wait to pass on Helen's endeavors to the rest of the town. He was that proud of her and not in such a way as to gloat, but in a way as to say, "My daughter is my pride and joy and I am so proud of the woman she has become." Helen was always his Greek Princess and rightfully so. He was just as proud of his son Costa. Costa followed in the family footsteps and one could always find him behind the counter at Tonys from the time he was a little boy. You see, Mr. Revis owned and operated Tony's Pizza Palace which was just a short walk (across a usually very dangerous) street. Year after year there would be times throughout the day where I would be driving by and there he was crossing the street to head back to the restaurant or to head home after a long, hard day's work. When Helen got married to Brian and had her two little blessings, Mr Revis would love to keep me updated on the girls and their exciting news. He adored going to their dance recitals and for them, the sun rose and set on their Papu. There is one picture that is standing out in my mind that I saw of Olivia and Mr. Revis after her dance recital a few years back. He had given her flowers and he was walking to the car carrying her. He had such an adoring look in his eyes as he looked at her. It was such a precious image that I never forgot about it.

I use to love to go over to Helen's house to play or to go into the restaurant for the main reason being that Mr. Revis had this way of making you feel like the most important person in the world. It didn't matter who you were, you were treated like family the minute you walked through the door of his home, or the door of the restaurant, which in essence was just an extension of his living room. For me personally, there was always a "KERRI!" shouted the moment he would lay eyes on me. Simultaneously as he would boom out my name in his Greek accent, his arms would extend wide ready for that big hug. Never was there a greeting without a hug and a how are you. Never, was there anything less than this big huge greeting that made you feel like a million bucks. Like royalty.

I used to get a big kick out of going over to Helen's and listening to her parents talk. I LOVED their accent and her Mom was always equally as sweet as her father. The house ALWAYS smelled of delicious Greek food and there was at least one cat (Lucky?) roaming about the home who sometimes got even better treatment than Helen or Costa.. if that is at all possible! The Revis's always made sure you felt at home whether you were in their house or at the restaurant. Mr. Revis always checked in with us as well to make sure we were walking the straight and arrow. "Kerri, how you doing in school? You doing well? You getting A's? You have to get A's you know to be successful in America." Then there were Helen's birthday parties at the restaurant. Nothing beat those. Nothing could even come close to the taste of Tony's pizza and well hey... a girl could surely get sick of eating chicken so often and just want that pizza. I was probably only 6 years of age when I knew the phone number to Tonys by heart because it was a place my entire family frequented and still frequent. It didn't matter what time we went either.. Mr. Revis was always there to greet us.

A few short years ago we held an unofficial "Cancer Sucks" pizza party at the restaurant for our friend Shannon who was making her way through becoming a two time breast cancer survivor. Mr. Revis was there because.. well..when wasn't he? He just LOVED seeing all these classmates of Helen's. He had a smile on that night bigger than any one I had previously seen. I know he was so proud to be part of something for Shannon as well. He was beaming with happiness that we were all there, in his "living room" celebrating Shannon's cancer free night. He was happy to contribute to that special evening of joy and I remember sitting there as a 30 something, feeling the exact same way I did as a teenager. The ambiance never changed and there was just something so very special about that.

I have so many wonderful memories of this man and the entire Revis family that it would be impossible to list them all. Throughout the years Helen and I stayed friends and I am happy to say that we still try and get together once a month or so to catch up on life. I always look forward to this adult time and it is always followed by a lot of laughter. My Helen, is like her father in having the ability to make people feel comfortable and at ease around her. She is a jack of all trades like her Dad. She succeeds at whatever she puts her mind into doing and she is not afraid of hard work. Something I surely don't tell her enough is how very smart I find her. She is one of the most intelligent women that I know and she is so very strong and determined. She is a WONDERFUL mother and a fabulous wife. For me, she was always that person. That person that could do it all and make it look easy. I look up to her. Mostly because she knows what she wants, she knows what is best and she stops at nothing to achieve it.

And then there came this day that seemed to have happened way too soon. I got the text early Saturday morning and couldn't press my fingers to dial her number fast enough. Surely she was going to tell me that it wasn't true. She texted me wrong. There was some mistake. As soon as I heard her voice, I knew it wasn't. How I wish that there was something I could do to make this the slightest bit easier on her, on the girls, Brian, on Mrs. Revis and Costa. Life doesn't make sense sometimes. What I find comforting for myself and something I think that in time the entire Revis family will find comforting is the fact that Mr. Revis was sort of an icon in Smithfield. It sounds silly to say that but it's the truth. As this news has spread, the entire town is in disbelief and is mourning him as well. I guess I never thought of him in that respect because he was Helen's Dad. He was an extension of Helen.. but when I sit here and truly think about it.. he didn't just treat me like that princess... He treated everyone who walked through his doors like that. He has touched so many people and it is so comforting to know how well loved he was and always will be by how everyone is reacting to this news.

Mr. Revis, you will be missed. I just can't fathom walking through those doors of the restaurant and not seeing you. I just cant fathom it. But I will be comforted by all the times I was able to relish in your exuberant greeting when I did walk through those doors. I will be comforted by the fact that I just knew you and what a remarkable family man you were. You worked so hard your entire life. As Helen said, you only knew one speed. I wish for you eternal peace now. You can rest. Helen is strong and we will help her get through this. The 6 musketeers will pull together and we will continue to make you proud. We love her and we love you. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to know you and for continuing to teach me the true meaning of family every time I walked through your doors. You are going to be so very missed, but I can promise you... that you will never be forgotten. Rest peacefully Mr. Revis as you surely deserve those angel wings.

Where's That Mother of the Year Award?

Once again I have been nominated for the "Mother of the Year" award. Sheesh.. I'll tell ya. We started out well with Hannah and school and it quickly crumbled. Her first three days went smooth without much todo. The long weekend came and then Tuesday morning arrived. I walked her to the play area and sat in the car to watch her to be sure she would be okay until it was time to enter the building. (I'll get into the school's safety issues in due time). In the blink of an eye I see her wailing. I run out of the car to her and realized that she had fallen and had skinned her knee. With that skinned knee came a massive meltdown. Crying hysterically she begins to tell me that she in fact does not like school at all and has been lying about liking it. She doesn't want to go and she wants to stay with me. At which point she grasped onto my legs and wouldn't let go for dear life. I was so completely taken aback that I don't think I spoke for a few seconds. My Hannah? Not want to run right into school? Wants to be with ME? This is COMPLETELY uncharacteristic of Hannah. She is my independent, eager to learn new things, can't wait to be with my friends, Hannah. WHAT HAPPENED? She was obviously not letting go so after retrieving the other kids from the car I walked her to the nurse's office where she was bandaged up. When the nurse had her happy and distracted, I made my exit. The next few days went much the same with me leaving her in tears lined up to walk into the building. It BROKE my heart! I have been so confused as to what is going on and how she transitioned so well last year and not this year. All I can come up with is that we had such a loving, caring, nurturing and sweet Kindergarten teacher. This year, I have yet to meet her 1st grade teacher. (Again, this will be addressed in a future post). I have seen her once at dismissal and that has been the extent of it. She seems nice enough, but I am not sure if one could compare to Miss Geremia who is now Mrs. Thomas. As I am totally perplexed by the situation, I also know that I can't overreact and that we just have to give it some time and allow Hannah to settle back into the routine. I am sure me having the summer off to be with her has aided in this difficult adjustment as well. AND there is that matter of new baby Cameron also. So I made a deal with myself that I would keep a close eye on the situation but also give it enough time to fully asses before I go in the school all crazy Mom like.

INSERT WEEKEND STORY HERE: As if Hannah wasn't having a tough time already, CCD started on Sunday. She was SO excited because this meant she would be seeing Nya the third musketeer of their group. The three of them are the best of friends and Nya moved to Cranston this summer so Hannah has been bummed about not having her around in class, etc.. So she and Makenzie save a seat in the middle for Nya and their reunion. Nya comes in and they are delighted. Then Nicholas comes in (Hannah's "boyfriend" and my good friend's son) and they are all so happy to be together. They start to call the classes to line up and go into the classrooms and they get to Hannah's age group. They call Nya, Makenzie, then Nicholas.. and they send them to the class. Hannah is sitting all alone and suddenly realizes, they are all together in class and she is all alone without anyone she knows in the other class. I think I literally felt my heart break for her as I ran to scoop her up as the tears were streaming down her face. After comforting her for a few minutes, I marched her down to the class where her friends were and explained the situation to the teacher who was more than willing to have her stay in his class. I then explained the situation to Sister Dot who was more than willing to accommodate the situation. Sighhhhh Could Hannah have had a more traumatic week? LOL


Fast forward to yesterday when I get a phone call from the school nurse telling me she has Hannah in her office. She is complaining of her throat and a stuffy nose. She hasn't got a fever and her throat is barely pink. When I asked to speak with her, I was told I couldn't.. well because she is complaining of a sore throat and all.. and germs.. and the phone.. Not quite sure exactly why she couldn't alcohol the phone afterwards, but okay, I go with it. So I throw the other kids in the car and leave my studio work in Pawtucket to go assess the situation. When I get there, I get the feeling that Hannah is now putting the school nurse out. I explained that we are having some transition issues and she replies, "Well she is making a habit out of coming down to my office." As I was about to address this, Hannah came bounding down the hallway wanting to show Layla her classroom. (For ambiance.. add in the fact that Layla is melting down due to an interrupted nap and Cameron is screaming his head off) I looked at her and asked her if she were well enough to go back to class. She replied she was and I sent her right back as I left to calm the younger two.

When Hannah came home I grilled her about how many times she had been to the nurse's office. She said 3 times in total. Once the day she skinned her knee with me and twice yesterday. Before lunch she went down and the nurse told her to go to lunch and see if she felt better. After lunch she went back stating she wasn't feeling better. I believe this. I believe the visits were 3 in total. I explained to Hannah that if she was okay to be in class then she cant keep going down to the nurse's office. I went into great depth about Emily, the girl who cried wolf so many times that when she was telling the truth, nobody believed her. I grilled it into her to make sure she understood the difference and I do believe the point was driven home. I understand that the nurse probably thinks she is this type of child because she is new and doesn't know Hannah so I am going to have to speak to her tomorrow and explain the situation.


As I got in about 9:30 last night from the gym, I went upstairs to shower and I heard her crying. I went into her room and realized she was half awake, half asleep. My heart immediately sank. I knew.. I knew... I just knew she REALLY didnt feel well and all along she WAS telling the truth. I felt HORRIBLE for drilling her earlier when all along she just didnt feel right and couldn't vocalize it. (Something that Hannah never could do, I believe due to all the pain she was in as an infant). A few more episodes of her crying and I woke her up completely and gave her Motrin and let her sleep in my bed. Sure enough she said it was her ear that hurt. This time the right one. When she got up this morning she said she felt much better. I also noticed she slept longer than she has been. For some reason she has been getting up quite early lately. Even though she said she was better, I made the appointment at the doctor. She didn't have school and I wanted peace of mind.


Not only does Hannah have an ear infection.. HER TUBES ARE OUT! I repeat.. HER TUBES ARE OUT! These are the third set of tubes that she has had inserted and these tubes WERE ONLY PUT IN LESS THAN TWO MONTHS AGO! July 13th to be exact! I was literally beside myself! Seeing that our appointment was with the nurse practitioner and the office was slamming, I knew there wouldn't be time to pull Dr. Sowa aside and voice my concerns. I am going to have to make that phone call tomorrow. Yet, where do we go from here? Do they insert them AGAIN? DO they wait? DO we go through the entire winter with her in pain and missing school? WHAT am I supposed to do? Mind you that I am completely TERRIFIED of going through another ruptured ear drum experience. So here I sit completely dumbfounded about the situation. I am sure after a good night's sleep I will figure the solution and proper steps to take.. I am just completely exhausted with all of this sickness drama lately! Layla currently has a double ear infection. This I know only after taking Cameron in last week for his terrible diaper rash (which turned out to be yeast and eczema and has cleared quite well with the proper medication) and having Dr. Sowa say, "I hear her wheezing.. let me check her as well." Cameron also caught the cold and is completely congested. OYE! WHAT on earth is this winter going to be like? I'm losing my mind already!

Furthermore, when I went to go take Cam's Baptism photo's at the studio, I realized that the outfit that was made for him was stained! I had ordered it off of Etsy and I am looking at it in the daylight and the linen looks completely bleached stained all over the front of the vest. I freak of course, 1-because I paid money for the outfit and want it to be perfect and 2-because..well I want it to be perfect! I emailed the woman immediately and she was very sweet about the situation yet, she was leaving for vacation today. In the end, I decided to keep the outfit and make do since there wouldn't be enough time to find another and she refunded me 50%. She took her spool of linen outside and saw the same defective fabric. Something that wasn't visible to her or me inside the dimly lit house. She did feel bad and I was ready to live with it until I spoke to my mother in law today who is insisting that it is a sign because my sister in law Jill, Cam's God mother, really wanted to buy the outfit. So now I think I will return the outfit for a complete refund and mom in law and I are heading to Joe's Place tomorrow to search for a new one!

As if one more thing couldn't go wrong, I had uploaded the pics of Cameron I took last week onto the CVS photo website last night to order the 8 x 10's as centerpieces for the Baptism. I thought this was great because I didn't have to lug the kids and do them all myself in the store. I go to pick them up today and they messed them up! I just wanted 8 x 10's. They cropped and blew up images so much so that half of Cam's head was cut out of the shot! SERIOUSLY? I emailed CVS and they told me about their 100% customer satisfaction guaranteed policy and to return them for a full refund. Which I did, but not without complete attitude by the photo person. I am SORRY, but I would like my son's whole head present at his Baptism, thank you very much! What the??? Mon Dieu! I know.. trust me I know that none of this makes any iota of a difference because all that matters is that my beautiful little boy is present for us to contest to raise him in the Catholic Faith. I know this. Yet, that detail oriented part of me sometimes takes over and can really drive me crazy! I was going to be an event planner before I found out I was pregnant for Hannah!

So my long winded post is through and I will leave you by saying.. Stay tuned for my comments about the safety and unorganized craziness of Hannah's school!

Andrea & Thadd's Engagement Shoot RCB Matunuck, Rhode Island August 2010

Cameron John 3 months

Survived

Well we survived our first 3 days back at school and back at work. Hannah transitioned exceptionally well, as I knew she would. This is not to say that I am not a little concerned (again) with a few safety issues at her school and I plan to meet with the principal next week to discuss them further. I know the school has had a lot of administrative replacement and movement, but I still dont see why they cant come up with the proper organizational skills as to make the first few days a bit easier on the kids as well as the parents. Some of it is pure common sense. Hannah does like her teacher and she seems very enthusiastic about learning more skills and participating in 1st grade. She is happy to be back amongst all of her girlfriends as well.

As far as work is concerned, I had an exceptionally hard time adjusting back. I find it very difficult for reasons I am not able to explain here. It was really tough on me however, the babies seemed to do quite well. Layla seems happy to be back in our work schedule and Cameron adjusted remarkably also. He has gone down in the pack n play for naps and loves the portable swing as well. Yes, it can be a bit tough to multitask with the two of them, but I can assure you that this is not the most difficult task of my job. I am sure a few more days of playing "catch up" will help me feel better about the situation but it sure as hell is not going to stop me from playing the lottery in hopes to someday be a stay at home mom!

Still on track at the gym, however the weight coming off has completely slowed down which can be quite frustrating. I am working so hard.. I want it off! I want it off now! It has been tough to go this week amongst all the chaos of returning back to work and Hannah being back in school. I am exhausted come 8:00pm but I have pushed on and kept going. PLEASE... weight.. come off! PLEASE!

We had a great night last night as the girls had their girlfriends Makenzie and Mia over for the Camp Rock Final Jam movie. They were adorable and seemed to have a great time. Yet, I am not so sure how much of the movie they actually watched since they seemed to have had more fun playing and dancing about. Thankfully, Hurricane Earl didnt seem to measure up as they had originally thought and although I haven't heard the official word yet from my Dad, 1W3 seems to be standing strong in it's place. I would have been completely devastated had the surf swept this cottage away on us. Thank you Lord for sparing our little piece of heaven!

Following are some pictures of Hannah's 1st day and our visit with my girlfriend Sara who had her precious baby Aria a mere 2 weeks after I had Cameron. Aria is a beautiful little baby girl and I was so happy to have spent some time with Sara! Hoping to get to NYC this Christmas to visit again with her!

Summer's come to an end

It's official. Today is the last day of summer vacation. For all of us! To say that I am miserable would be an understatement! I feel like I could cry at the drop of a pin yet I am trying to stay upbeat around the kids. We are keeping it low key today and just spending quality time reading, being silly and giving loves. I would do anything for this not to end. Unfortunately, time keeps on going and waits for no one and we must embark on this next phase in our lives. Hannah is about to be a first grader! As sad as I am about her growing up on me, I am so excited for her as well. I just know she is going to do a fantastic job. The babies will be heading to work with me tomorrow and I am sure we will figure it all out. I will be glad when all of the anxiety is done and over with.

So goodbye care free days of summer. I am going to miss you tremendously. You have brought me many, many wonderful memories with my 3 children and I will be forever grateful for this time that I was able to share with them. Goodbye maternity leave. Wasn't it just yesterday that I was begging for that precious baby to make their arrival? Thank you for giving me this time to spend with my darling baby boy. You have come and gone so quickly, but I know that there are still so many more good times yet to be had. As long as I have these gorgeous children, my family and their health, I know all will be okay.

Just gonna forge on forward and get through these next couple of days.

I love you Hannah, Layla-Grayce and baby Cameron!!! I LOVE YOU!

Time

What I wouldn't do to turn back the hands of time and be at the beginning of the summer again. I can't believe how quickly this time has flown by and my one summer home with my three children is closing in on an end. Sigh. In a mere 5 days, Miss Hannah will be entering the 1st grade and I am heading back to work with two small children. Double Sigh. I know how fortunate I was to have this time off with them and I know all good things must come to an end.. I just can't help being depressed about how I have been able to spend so much TIME with them this summer and how quickly it is all going to end. Hockey and dance will be starting for Hannah as well as CCD. Layla will also be taking dance. Our schedule is about to get insane and I am having severe anxiety about how I am going to manage it all and still get that QUALITY time in with them without blinking.. since it seems like when I blink.. they grow at magnificent speed!

There is always a bright side to things however as well. I know this. I truly LOVE the FALL! I love apple picking and baking apple pie. I LOVE my beloved Patriots and Football Sundays. (Side Note: How stinking classy is Wes Welker? Did anyone see him last night shake the hand of the player on the opposite team who most likely tore his knee the same way Wes did last year?) I LOVE Halloween and taking the kids in the wagon to trick or treat. So yes, there is so much to LOVE about the Fall and it's festivities. I just pray that I am able to manage it all and still feel complete with the kids.

Another exciting event will be Cameron's Baptism scheduled for the end of the month. It is all coming together. I ordered his outfit off of Etsy and it is currently being made. Father Najim will be Baptising him and I am sooooo very thankful for that. He will have Baptized all three of my babies and that means the world to me. The celebration afterwards is scheduled at Via Roma and I am thrilled about that as well. It is going to be an entirely Italian affair for my little man. Complete with Sinatra and Bennett playing at the celebration! LOL I just have to order the cake and get some Italian centerpieces and we are good to go! Mom Murphy cordially offered to make the favors for us and she is making chocolate crosses. I am sure they will be darling. Nothing but the best for my little Prince on the day he is to be Baptized!

Speaking of my Prince, we have successfully transferred him to the crib this week! Hooray! I cant believe it! I really cant. Layla NEVER did this. She would scream for hours! I kid you not that one night we let it go on for 2 hours before Billy and I looked at each other and said, NO MORE! We couldn't do it. The most Cam cried was 20 minutes and it was not even a serious cry. He is doing great! He usually does a 5 hour stretch and then a 2 to 3 hour stretch. I cant complain about that! He is such a little sweetie! He melts me when he laughs and smiles at me. I still am in awe that I have this gorgeous little boy to hold and love!

Last but not least we are at the end of 4 weeks at the gym and on the diet. I am proud to say that I am 14lbs lighter. I am happy and proud of myself. It is so not easy to be doing this all after 8pm when I would much rather be resting and getting a good night's sleep. I have worked hard and I am determined to work even harder to get it all off! I will do this. I know I will.

Heading to the studio to do a shoot with the kids and to visit my Shannon. Will hopefully have some great pics to post when I get back!

A Case of the Sickies!

It looks like all of our good times have caught up with us and the Murphy clan has been stuck in the house since last Friday! I woke up Friday morning feeling fine but around 3pm I started feeling funky. We had spent the gorgeous day in Newport walking around and even finding a Farmer's Market! We bought some tomatoes and some all natural olive oil cream for Cam's skin. When we got home, I fell asleep on the chair and woke up knowing I had a fever as my skin was on fire but I was shivering with chills. Sure enough, this Mama had caught a virus. A yucky summer virus that contained a high fever, chills, aches and a nasty sore throat. It wasnt long before the banana got it and she ended up with 105.2 fever on Sunday evening. Then the two little ones followed suit and so we have been stuck inside during all this gorgeous weather this week! I think Cameron is on the mend and his fever is now only low grade, but it is lingering a bit in Miss Layla. We had plans to be in Mystic today with Ant Denise and the kids but unfortunately we had to reschedule. Hoping to get the visit in before school starts as I would love to see those little darlings.

We did get a trip to the American Girl Doll Store in on Sunday before Hannah's fever spiked. Auntie Jill had made these reservations at the Bistro for Hannah for her birthday a few months ago. We surprised Hannah and she was so excited once she found out what her special treat was all about. Auntie Jill and Uncle Dave were so generous to the girls and to us and the lunch was phenomenal! The entire day was adorable with the little chairs for the dolls complete with teacups and saucers. The girls had a blast and Cam was an angel. Alexis even got her hair done at the AG Doll Salon and the day was made complete with some new matching pj's for both Hannah and Alexis. Layla LOOKED like a little doll walking around the place with the American Girl Doll bag on her shoulder. She had purchased a new Fall outfit for her Bitty Baby, Emily. (Yes, my girls named these dolls on their own). I was glad we were able to fit this in with everyone being sick! Hoping we didnt pass our germs on to anyone!

The rest of the week has just been a lot of resting. Which, isnt such a bad thing since I swear no matter how many hours I sleep, I still cant catch up and I feel so tired lately. I did manage to get a few shots of Cameron yesterday in between his naps. Poor little buddy had such a fever and still he smiled at me and the camera. He is just such a lovey and even when he is fussy from feeling yucky, I could still just eat him up! I snapped a great one of his tiny toes which I decided to use for his Baptism invitation. Hoping to get to the studio sometime in the next week or so to get some really nice ones of all the kids and some to display at his Baptism Celebration.

I did cancel my gym appointment last Friday with my trainer since I could hardly walk never mind lift weights. But I kept this week's and have battled through. I am getting stronger by the day. I am quite proud of myself and my accomplishments thus far. This is my 3rd week in and I am down 8+ pounds. I have gone faithfully with the exception of last Friday and I have pushed through when I thought I couldnt do any more. I know I have to do this for myself. I know that the payoff will feel great. I have been there before and I can do it again. I just have to stay focused and determined and I am praying that as the months go by, I will feel more and more comfortable in my skin.

Summer 2010

Oh my gosh! Where has the time gone this summer? We have been so busy that I can barely find 5 minutes to sit and type updates! Yet, this is exactly how I wanted it to be! A fun filled crazy happy summer! I can say I fulfilled that desire for sure.

The girls are doing real well and enjoying our gallivants to New Hampshire, Matunuck, blueberry picking, Newport etc..etc.., I still cant believe that in a mere 3 weeks Hannah will be a first grader! AH.. I am tucking that thought away until I am strong enough to deal with it. She is growing like a weed and aside from her occasional bouts with freshiness, she is having a great summer. My darling Layla.. oh my Layla.. she has truly comprised the role of the "family klutz" this summer. I tell ya that the poor little thing has fallen too many times to count and Tuesday was the worst by far when she went down 14 hardwood stairs and crashed onto the tile floor. I knew it was going to happen, I knew it. I drill her 80 million times a day to be careful on the stairs, dont play around and pay attention. She had snuck up a pair of plastic play shoes and I heard her clonking in them while I was showering, but for sure I thought she would never attempt the stairs in them. WRONG! I ran to her just as she slid down the first step and I literally saw her forward roll down the rest. HORRIBLE! Thankfully Billy was home and he ran to her as I screamed to him. She came up a bloody mess but thankfully she was easily soothed and she didnt cry for too long. We were able to stop the bleeding and realized that it was her nose that took the brunt of it. After a trip to the doctor and some x-rays, we deemed it not broken and she is healing well. In all honesty, I thought it was going to be so much worse. The way she fell and how she hit, UGH.. I keep getting the vision. Yet, I am thankful that she walked away with only minor injuries!

My sweet Chubba Luv has been doing wonderfully as well. He is SUCH a sweet little baby! I can't even handle it. Half the time I am unaware that he is even there. He loves to sleep and when he is awake, he is smiling.. all the time. He loves to talk to me and coo and laugh. I could just eat him up forever. He too, is growing like a weed and I cant believe that we have already past the 2 month mark! He loves his baths and kicks like an Olympic swimmer as soon as I put him in his baby tub. He goes down for me in the bassinet without a problem at night and will sleep sometimes for 5 hours straight! I couldn't ask for anything more! I do know that the time is nearing for me to switch him to the crib and I am surely dreading that. I love having him right there beside me and it is so much easier when you are nursing. At the same time, I want him to continue his good sleep habits and I know the crib is probably best to do that with.

Last but not least, I have committed myself to this losing weight battle. I intend to win it by all means necessary! I started last week with a trainer at the gym and slowly but surely it is coming off. I have been working so very hard! The only time I have to exercise is after 8:00pm at night. This can be tough as this is the time of night that I usually just want to crash on the couch. Yet, I have mustered up the will power to go to the gym every night at this time. It is the ONLY way I can do this and I am as determined as ever to plug on through until I am where I want to be. After almost 2 weeks, I can see and feel a difference already. The weight is slowly coming off. I am trying to have patience with the fact that it is a slow process. It is difficult since I am really really working so very hard at it. The diet too has been crucial. From eating whatever I wanted to 6 small meals of vegetables and protein around a family who is constantly eating cookies and cheese and pizza and fries.. yet I have stayed strong. I will do this.. I know I can!

Off to go see Toy Story 3 and then have Mom & Dad for dinner!