The Bambino

Oh my what a wonderful visit we had at the ultrasound office yesterday.  My OB sent me to a place that performs Level 2 ultrasounds based on my age and the fact that the JuneBug didnt cooperate and show his or her face at my anatomy scan.  Also because Billy has a minor heart/valve issue that may be congenital.  We had to do this for Layla as well because of Billy's heart issue but the place we went to yesterday... OH ME LORD!  Who would of thunk that a place so beautiful could exist on Allens Avenue?????  I tell you I was begging the tech to see if there was a way I could give birth there!  The waiting room was just full of these bright wonderful colors with a whole seperate kids area filled with anything a child could possibly want.  It was accessorized with a gigantic tropical fish tank.  Layla thought it was magnificent and loved that the fish kept playing hide and seek with her.  The receptionist desk had an array of cinamon cake and fruit displayed on it for your liking and the music sounded as if I was the Red Door Spa at the Biltmore.  I havent even begun to describe the bathroom yet!  That came complete with a shower and beautiful stone tile and one of those modern sink and faucet duos.. it was soooo very elegant and beautiful!  I swear, I didnt want to leave!

The tech we had was wonderful and so very nice.  She kept playing with the baby and saying how cute he or she was!  JuneBug was a bit rambunctious and was having a jolly time flipping all about.  Yet, the tech was able to get all of the pictures she needed in order to tell us that the bug was looking just right!  There was one point where she said she was going "down there" if we wanted to know the sex and for a split second I looked at Billy and we were about to cave, but somehow I mustered up the courage to avoid the temptation and I looked away and said no!  Afterwards the heart doctor met us in his office and went over the results as well saying that the heart looked great and the blood was flowing through the chambers just fine!  It was such a wonderful appointment and looking at the pictures.. I just think they are sooo very cool!  I have never had pictures of either of my girls in the utero like this and I cant help but notice that this bug looks so very much like Miss Layla!    Ahhh  only 19 more weeks and the identity will be revealed! 

Last but not least, Mom and Dad left for Florida today.  They are driving down to Naples and will be there for 6 weeks.  Is it bad that I still cry when my parents leave?  Seriously, ever since I was a kid and they would go on business trips, they would leave and I would bawl my eyes out.  Even back then I was always so worried that this goodbye would be the last.  Hence the reason why I hate goodbyes.  I know this trip will be good for them, especially my Mom.  I am hoping they get exactly what they need and that is some much deserved rest and relaxation.  I just pray that they make it there safely.  I also pray that the sky opens up and sends me plane tickets so I can take the girls and go visit them!  LOL  Happy Friday!

Couldn't resist posting this of all the grandchildren on the Rianna side.  I photographed them in November and we had this portrait blown up and custom framed and gave it to my parents for Christmas.  They absolutely loved it! 

Here, Layla is 2, Hannah is 5, Reanna is 1 and Braeden was just over 2 months old.

JuneBug

That's All I Ask For Anymore - Trace Adkins

it was a home run when the game was tied

a pick up truck when I could drive

one pink line when katie said I'm late

it was a passing grade, a pretty girl

all the money in the world

what mattered then kept changing every day

but when I bow my head tonight

there'll be no me myself and I

just watch my wife and kids please lord

that's all I ask for any more

now a days it's crazy how

a passing storm, a siren sound

can make me drop it all and pick up the phone

to hear her say that all's okay is all I need to know these days

can't wait to see their faces when I get home

and when I bow my head tonight

there'll be no me myself and I

just watch my wife and kids please lord

that's all I ask for any more

let 'em outlive me by a hundred years

let their laughter dry up all their tears

let 'em love and be loved back like I have been

when I bow my head tonight

there'll be no me myself and I

just watch my wife and kids please lord

that's all I ask for any more

that's all that matters anymore

This has certainly been a week of many emotions for many reasons.  Without getting into it, because I truly am not able to at this point, I just cant stop the tears from flowing.  I know that these hormones are most definitely a contributing factor and I am keeping that in mind.  There have been so many things going on that every time I feel as though I am standing back up, there comes another blow.  I have to keep reminding myself that wallowing in misery will not get me anywhere and does nothing for the situation.  That standing tall and appreciating time is what matters most and what will lead me to no regrets in the end.  So that is what I am going to put all my might in doing.  I have always prided myself in being so grateful for what I have and I need to revisit this because although things are a bit tough at the moment, it could always be so much worse.  So this is me, getting rid of the yuckies, and lifting my spirits to realize that yes indeed, I am so very fortunate.


To add to my teary eyes today, we hit another milestone in our house.  Miss Layla started daycare today for the first time.  Although I enjoy her tremendously at work, I also felt as though I was barricading her in to a world of adults.  She is so very sweet and endearing and she needed a day where she could be with children of her age and enjoy them.  I anticipated her transitioning easily because we have been discussing her starting "school" where she already knew a few friends.  She also gets frustrated when she cant accompany Hannah to school.  Well, it didnt go as easily as I had expected.  The poor baby got so very frightened by all the kids and clung to me like saran wrap!  Thus, not making it easy on Momma Bear.  The other sight that made it difficult was that almost every single one of the kids had a crouping horrible cough.  UGH!  Layla's immune system is terrible enough.. how is this all going to play out?  I did manage to get to my car before the tears began to roll down my cheeks and I was able to stop them prior to stepping into work.  I just hope we are doing the right thing by her.  I want her to socialize with children her own age, but I am not sure if it is the best thing for her health.  Oh how I wish I could just win the lottery and be a stay at home Mom so I wouldnt have to be struggling with these decisions!  I did call to check on her when I got to my office and they said she was settling in fine, so that eased my fears.  I just wish there was a sign telling me that yes, I am making the right decision!  Poor Billy got my frantic sobbing phone call as I drove to work.  Thankfully, he was able to help me put myself back together and back in control.. LOL  He must think to himself that he married a looney!  Thank God for him!


As the days go on I can feel the bug kicking more and more.  This is such a comforting feeling for me.  I cant even begin to explain how excited I am to spend this time with my babies this summer.  I have such a need to make this a memorable and unforgettable summer!  Solely because we will have time..TIME!  What's more precious than time?  Absolutely nothing in my book.  I cant stop daydreaming about our days to come down the beach spending time with the girls, the new bug, Jules and Reanna and Mom.  These are most definitely the thoughts that have been calming me.  For now, these are the thoughts I will be keeping!

Viewing the June Bug!

Yesterday was the BIG day and I had my anatomy ultrasound!  We got to see the June Bug loud and clear on the flat screen tv!  I picked Miss Hannah up a bit early from school and we headed on over to the doctors.  Hannah was so cute about being able to recognize the baby's head and belly.  She was also so helpful in taking care of Layla while the tech viewed the bug.  I closed my eyes and turned my head when the tech went to the under regions.  I was good and even though the temptation was so overwhelming, I kept my promise to keep the baby's sex a suprise to the end!  June bug was all cozy and sleepy and actually had it's head tucked so far away that the tech was not able to scan the baby's face so Dr. Boyle would like me to have another ultrasound in two weeks just to make sure everything checks out okay.  I was thrilled to be able to have another ultrasound, but at the same time, the temptation will be staring me right in the face again!  I am sure I will get through it just fine.  Another week and I will be half way there.  WOW did THAT go by fast!  I knew it would.  I just love feeling the bug move and squirm.  It really is the most reassuring feeling.  I cant wait to meet this little one and I have been having some really vivid dreams about caring for three little monkeys.  I will say, I am getting the "girl" vibe.  Not to say that it couldnt be a boy, but last night's dream entailled me frocklicking about Block Island with my three girls.  We shall see.  Whatever God's wish is I am fine with.  I just pray that this bug is healthy.  That is my one wish!

Other than that, not too much going on.  Billy is still up in New Hampshire and the girls and I have been getting by.  I have been organized for the first time in my life with making meal plans and having dinner on the table at a decent time.  Organization is certainly key in this respect.  Now if I can only find the time to incorporate exercise into this regime, I would be all set.  By the time the girls go down to bed, I am utterly exhausted and I am not able to do much at all.  Moreover, Hannah ahs been giving me a real tough time these past two weeks.  Again it is always hard to decipher her behavior.  I am suspecting an ear infection but I can never be sure.  I just ordered an otoscope because I am tired of the guessing game.  She doesnt have a fever, but her eyes look sunken in and tired.  She has also been sluggish lately and Billy even noticed her lack of enthusiasm at hockey this weekend.  I received a phone call from school this afternnon saying she was at the nurse's office and both her ears were hurting her.  She did not want to eat her lunch or go back to class.  So I went and picked her up.  I have a prescription for antibiotic that I think I may just start her on it.  It becomes such a pain to try and get her into the Pediatrician's office for an ear check.  Lately I have been there every 2 weeks and they have diagnosed her with one, so I am hoping to just start her on the meds and fingers crossed I will see an improvement in her behavior.  As it stands I am quite disgusted by the way she has been talking to me.  I have taken away everything from television to movie night and I have not seen much of an improvement.  I really need to get a grip on this because she is only 5.  If she acts this way now, we are doomed by the time she is 10.  She can be so very sweet and lovable, but when she gets the freshies.. it is brutal I tell ya.  So hopefully we will get a grip on this and send her on the right path!

That's all for today.  I will try and scan some pics of the June Bug and get them up on here tomorrow!